Do you ever look back on your life and think “I wish I’d done xyz?” Or “If I’d done (insert whatever you wish you’d done) differently, my life would have turned out different.” I’m sure we all do. I used to do that often. Think back on decisions that I made, or were made for me. And wonder if my life would be different now if I’d taken a different path.
You see growing up I hated Seattle. I really did. I hated the rain, the clouds, the moody sky. I loved high school but couldn’t wait to get as far away from this place as possible. So when it came time to apply for college I applied to all out of state colleges. Gettysburg, Texas Christian, Pepperdine and USC. Then my mom and dad stepped in and said their only requirement was that I apply to one in state school. So I applied to the university furthest away but still on this side of the mountains (because as much as I hated Western Washington, I hated Eastern Washington even more).
So when I got the letter from USC saying I’d been accepted I was ecstatic! USC! They wanted ME! USC was top of my list. And this is where my life took the direction that would forever change my future. Because I didn’t get to go to USC. $40k a year (back in 2001) was a lot of money. And my parents had promised they would pay for my college. But they couldn’t afford that. By the time we came to this realization, all the other school acceptance deadlines had passed except wouldn’t you know, the one in-state school I’d applied to.
For many years I wondered what my life would be like if I’d been able to go to USC. I wondered if I’d be living in California still, or if I’d be back in Seattle, or somewhere completely different. I wondered if I’d have gotten a job at the company where I met my hubby (I mean, I know I wouldn’t have ever thought to apply there if I’d been living in California at the time). I wondered if my college experience would have been better and if I would have more friends from college than I do.
You see, we all have those moments where we wonder how we got to where we did. Did I make the right choices? Did decision x influence the path my life lead or was this what it was always meant to be? Christians say that God has a plan for all of us. I agree with that to a certain extent, but I also think that God gave us the freedom to make our own choices. He has a general plan for our lives, but the path we take to get there is our own doing. It may be a hard road for some of us, but eventually you will get to exactly where you’re meant to be.
I guess I said all this just to say my life may have been completely different from what it is now if I’d gone to USC, but I feel like I’m right where I’m meant to be. And this is the first time I really, truly believe that. At 33 years old, I finally feel like I’m where I’m meant to be. God, or the universe, or my parents or whatever got me to this place I am now. And it’s exactly where I’m supposed to be. And boy does that feel good!
So if you ever question you’re life, wonder if you made the right decision, think about how your life could be different, just remember, you’re right where you’re meant to be.